The Go-Giver is a classic bestseller that brings to life the old proverb “give and you shall receive. The term “go-giver” is known for defining a set of values embraced by tons of people around the world. This timeless story continues to help its readers and listeners find fulfillment and greater success in business, in their personal lives, and in their communities. If you want a short book that breaks down the core values of business into 5 simple parables… look no further!
Remember, with each episode, we will provide a helpful Deep-Dive infographic where we break down the entire book on to 1 page! And we have a convenient link for you to find all of them! Visit invictusmultifamily.com/notes to find all of the sophisticated investor notes!
Here are our top 5 takeaways:
- Value
- Compensation
- Influence
- Authenticity
- Receptivity
Tweetable Quotes:
“Stop looking at your damn phone. Try your damnedest, when you’re with somebody to be like, okay, you’re the only person in this room.” – Anthony Vicino
“If you put others’ interest first, try to provide value to them first and foremost, then the rest should work itself out somewhere along the line for you.” – Dan Krueger
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** Transcripts
go giver
[00:00:00] Anthony: You know what today? I thought we would just, just completely forgo the intro and we just start talking Joe Rogan style. I like it. So weed berries, what do you think about weed berries and eating elk?
[00:00:25] Dan: Weed berries. I’m not even sure what weed berries are. I’ll be honest, but elk, I think sounds good. I don’t think I’ve had it.
[00:00:30] Anthony: I’ll be honest. I’ve never actually listened to a Joe Rogan, uh, episode. So never, I don’t, I don’t have a clear idea of how they go. Well, it usually
[00:00:38] Dan: starts with. Either the sound of a beverage being poured glasses. Clinky. No, not cans. He’s always pouring whiskey or a torch lady in a cigar. Oh, it’s usually.
And then just, you come in like mid conversation. You have no context for what was
[00:00:52] Anthony: going on. Okay. So cool. Have we succeeded? I don’t, we have no whiskey. We have no torch and we’re coming in mid sentence. We got [00:01:00] that. We might be confusing people. Perfect. So listeners, thank you for being here with us, trying a new intro, trying a new way of.
You know, expressing our creativity, maybe ORs, maybe doesn’t. Yeah, we’ll see. Um, but you know, thanks for being here. Welcome to the podcast. This a multi-family investing made simple. It is. I can’t make it a whole episode without actually saying the name. So today we’re gonna talk about a book in this book.
So usually on Wednesdays, when we do these episodes, we do five takeaways from Dan five takeaways from Anthony. But for this book, it’s so short and the book is literally broken into like five chapters. So. Really only five takeaways. So we’re only gonna share those five full disclosure. You’d probably be better off just reading the book real quickly.
It’d probably take you like 30
[00:01:46] Dan: minutes. Yeah. It’s really quick. It’s like afternoon read at the most maybe.
[00:01:51] Anthony: Yeah. But it is interesting because it’s told in the form of parables. And so each chapter it’s, it’s kind of a story. It’s fun. It’s engaging way of getting information. I think [00:02:00] that’s cool. And the, the takeaways are very strong.
If not a, I think the parables honestly make it a little
[00:02:05] Dan: corny. Yeah. Cuz you think it’s like this isn’t how things happen. This isn’t
[00:02:09] Anthony: light. Yeah. And you can, you can imagine like the counter argument being like, oh, but it could, or it, oh, it kind of has it’s life just doesn’t have the same amount of drama.
It. You can’t connect the points. The, the thing about parables for me is that they connect the points too cleanly. Yeah. And in life you can always look back and connect points, but they don’t always go together that cleanly. So still, I think the, the overarching message of these, these takeaways, this chapter, this book, um, are still very worthwhile.
Yeah. Very good. Yeah. So I think we’ve succeeded in. Intriguing the listener now they’re like, oh, could this be, are they talking about the Bible? That’s not a quick read, but there’s parables. um, is it Dr. Seus? That’s a quick read, but it’s not really a parable. They don’t know what we’re talking about.
Should do a Dr. Seuss book. okay. How about this listeners? If you want to hear a [00:03:00] Dr. Seuss, um, deep dive. It’s a lot takeaways and get over to the YouTube, go to multi-family investing made simple and leave it in the comments, let us know which book you’d like us to deep dive. And we will put together the sophisticated investor notes for this Dr.
Seuss book. It’s gonna be amazing. Um, and for of those that don’t know, uh, there is a companion document that goes with this podcast. It’s very interactive. And so you just go to Invictus, multifamily.com/notes, and that’s gonna take you to a folder that has about 20 sophisticated investor notes, which.
simple infographics that have all the takeaways are our takeaways from the different books that we’ve we’ve doved
[00:03:39] Dan: deeply into. Yeah. Sound right. Yeah. I mean, I don’t know if they’re interactive, they are static PDFs that you cannot interact with incorrect, but incorrect.
[00:03:48] Anthony: They are interactive in the sense that there’s a QR code on ’em.
Oh. And you can scan them and that will take. Places. I’m not gonna tell you where it’s gonna take you. So it is interactive to a degree.
[00:03:57] Dan: So have your antivirus ready? Yeah. [00:04:00] just, don’t
[00:04:00] Anthony: go scan random QR codes unless you trust the, the source. And I would not trust the source on this one. Yeah. Do you know these guys, which is us?
Do you know us? I mean, sure. You’d give us money to invest in, in real estate because like, yeah, we know that, but important. Not to tech savvy, we, I don’t even know what a Al is. I can’t tell you how much money I’ve sent to, to Nigerian prince. How many times I’ve been
[00:04:24] Dan: fished? Well, they’re PR I mean, they have money to give back to you, so it makes perfect sense
[00:04:28] Anthony: to I’m playing the long game.
I’m like, you know, I’ve, I’m like a venture capitalist. If I bet on a hundred Nigerian prince. Only one has to hit. Only one has to be real. That’s my thesis. Well,
[00:04:38] Dan: this ties in really nicely to the first takeaway actually. Oh, look at this.
[00:04:42] Anthony: Have we even said the name of the
[00:04:43] Dan: book yet? I don’t think so. I think we might have mumbled it.
No Reed chicken said no. So let’s not even gotten to the
[00:04:48] Anthony: let’s. Let’s talk about that. And then, then we’ll do your slicks segue. Cause that was, that was a good .
[00:04:55] Dan: Uh, so yeah, we’re doing the go giver by Bob Berg [00:05:00] and John David man spelled with. It’s
[00:05:04] Anthony: two things. It just occurs to me that obviously our listener knows what book we’re gonna do.
Cause that’s in the title. Some people
[00:05:10] Dan: just click, they don’t look. That’s
[00:05:11] Anthony: true. They’re just blindly clicking. That’s dangerous. There’s the place that’s dangerous. It’s gonna, that’s gonna take you places someday. Gonna click on the wrong link. Ask me how I know. Number two. Do you think that their writing relationship was similar to our writing relationship for passive investing made simple?
Or do you think? I think it
[00:05:25] Dan: was okay. Like I said, I think it was, um, One of ’em had, uh, more writing experience and they both BA this book is basically like a collection of their philosophies that they, uh, organically came to through life and business. And they decided to put it in the form of, of a parable.
But it, it it’s really similar to, to our setup. Yeah. One of ’em was actual writer. They both like had the same kind of philosophical views and, and world views. And they’re like, we should put this on paper and put it out. So I can’t remember, which is which honestly I’m guessing Bob Berg is [00:06:00] probably I’m thinking main one because he’s yeah.
Cause he’s written the one that’s yeah. I mean, one of them’s written a bunch, the other hasn’t yeah. That’s what
[00:06:05] Anthony: I gathered from him. I’m gonna gather that. Bob is the Dr. Is the, the writer of the two. I don’t know the other guy. I know Bob a little bit more. Am I say
[00:06:13] Dan: know, Bob? I don’t know. That’s the name that’s gonna pop up everywhere.
Um, John David Mann, like he’s he’s on there, but you’re not gonna, like, if it’s gonna be attributed to one person, it’s probably Bob
[00:06:22] Anthony: from let’s let’s dissect that real quick. That guy’s name. John David. That might as well just be John DOE, right? Like those are th that’s literally two of the most commonplace names ever.
Plus just man, he’s in the witness protection program. John David, man. I don’t think this guy’s real. that’s all I say might not be, this is a pseudonym. Um, little known fact. I don’t talk about this much, but I wrote under a pseudonym. Um, a couple of books. I’m not gonna tell you what they are. I’m not gonna tell you what genre they’re in.
Okay. Just know that they sold very. And, um, I’m very popular amongst a very, very particular demographic of human that I don’t wanna talk [00:07:00] about. Not sci-fi
[00:07:01] Dan: not sci-fi okay.
[00:07:03] Anthony: Yeah. Intriguing. Right. So, so listeners, if you have guesses as to what my pseudonym, what, like what genre, you’re not gonna guess the pseudonym, but if you can guess what genre.
[00:07:14] Dan: Was it like the trashy romance novels at grocery stores that are just like,
[00:07:18] Anthony: I don’t wanna talk about it. Yes. This is for the listeners to go leave the comment. Um, just know they are my highest grossing sales books of all time. Was it your
[00:07:26] Dan: picture on the cover of just no headless shirtless guy with a cowboy hat?
Yes,
[00:07:31] Anthony: just me and chaps. book had nothing to do about with men in chaps, just eight, but I’ve always looking for a reason to be, I got a new pair of chaps for Christmas. You know, living in Minnesota and in an urban environment, doesn’t afford me many opportunities to bust out the chaps is all I’m saying.
Okay. Okay. Yeah. Let’s talk about the book. Let’s do it. You had a really good segue before mm-hmm so listeners just go ahead and like, pretend. Like that is leading up to this instant right now. Mm-hmm okay. Let go
[00:07:59] Dan: [00:08:00] segue done. Um, so the first, like we said before, there’s basically like five main points, uh, in this book and they’re divided up into, I believe they refer to ’em as less or, uh, laws like the law of fill in the blank and the law of fill the blank.
[00:08:13] Anthony: Sounds so much more like legit when you used the word law, not rule law.
[00:08:18] Dan: You need to do this. Yeah. You’ll go to jail. You need to do this. Um, so yeah, the first one was the law of, uh, and if you guys know anything about us, which I’m sure you do, I’m sure you’ve gone on to our website and ed our core values.
You’ll notice that our first core value is we lead with value and that’s exactly what this, um, uh, lesson is speaking to. Um, and there’s a quote from the book that you are worth is determined by how much. More you give in value than you take in payment. And I feel like there’s a version of this sound bite that’s been used all over the place.
Um, I wanna say Neals, uh, uttered some, some version of this, but it’s basically just saying that you put others’ interest first, try to [00:09:00] provide value to them first and foremost, and the rest should work itself out somewhere along the line for you.
[00:09:06] Anthony: I was actually just listening to hormo of course, talk on a very similar concept, which is.
that if you have multiple product tiers, let’s say you’re selling something a hundred dollars. And really it’s like, it’s, it’s a killer product. It’s actually like $500 of, of value, but only priced at a hundred. Your customer’s gonna buy that and they’re gonna be like, this is awesome. What else do you got?
And if you come back and you’re like, oh, I have this a thousand dollars thing where like, in reality, there’s like $2,000 of value in there. Then they’re gonna come back after that and they’re gonna be like, this was awesome. What else do you got? Well, you can keep going at the value chain, but if at any, if at any.
what you deliver in value is equal to what they received in price. You will no longer have a riving fan. You will you’ll merely have a content customer, right? Like if you deliver $5,000 of value in exchange for $5,000 of price, then you got exactly what you asked for. [00:10:00]
[00:10:00] Dan: Well, theoretically, people wouldn’t even take that trade, right?
Because people are theoretically only gonna buy something that they P perceive is worth more than the money they’re handing. Like, no, one’s actually gonna think that through, but theoretically, that, that’s kind of the argument. If you’re charging five bucks for a burger, they, they want the burger more than they want five bucks.
[00:10:20] Anthony: Yeah. But that I would say, does that mean it’s worth more to them? The consumer it’s definitely. Worth more perceived value perceived. Yeah. Yeah. That’s the ticket because at the, at the end of the day, like I would trade $10 for a widget that I don’t necessarily think is worth more than $10. If I really just want the widget,
[00:10:42] Dan: you just want the widget more than you want $10.
Exactly. So that’s the
[00:10:45] Anthony: Delta, I think. Yeah. So, but the, the takeaway, I think that’s important here. To supered customer’s expectations or anybody’s expectations, even if they’re not a customer, just like people in your life by delivering more than what they expect. And then that, [00:11:00] that Delta between what they expected and which you actually gave that’s Goodwill mm-hmm
[00:11:05] Dan: and you definitely don’t wanna give ’em less, uh, hashtag tie Lopez.
So if you’re gonna sell like a thing for X amount of dollars, I’m sorry, who hashtag don’t Sue us. Yeah. Uh, You’ll uh, but no, I was someone like, um, was, was giving some feedback on one of his courses. Someone took a course of his and said,
[00:11:24] Anthony: oh, you’re probably thinking of, uh, coffee Zillow or like, yeah, yeah, yeah,
[00:11:28] Dan: no, no.
I don’t think it was him. Someone else,
[00:11:29] Anthony: someone that’s I watched coffee Zillow do one where he is like, this is there’s. This is. There’s nothing here. Right? There’s like no value.
[00:11:35] Dan: Yeah. So basically don’t do that. Yeah. Right. Uh, you definitely want to give people something that’s, that’s worth one the way you’re charging for, but you definitely don’t want to sell someone a piece of crap for way more.
It’s worth. I mean, there’s a lot of people doing that. There’s a lot of hucksters out there. So, um, I mean, it’s a good way
[00:11:51] Anthony: to make a buck and a pinch and in, in the short term, very short, but you won’t, we won’t make it very far.
[00:11:59] Dan: Yeah. I bought a, [00:12:00] uh, a Zeno gym in 2020 during COVID. I remember. Yeah. You remember those?
I remember that is I remember you debating on it where I spent, oh my God. I don’t even wanna talk
[00:12:09] Anthony: about the amount of time that you spent debating it. And then I was desperate. You finally pulled the trigger and then all but instantaneously regretted it. Like what have
[00:12:18] Dan: I done? And guess what they, I. I don’t know this for sure.
I haven’t checked, but I’d be willing to bet they’re not around anymore. A hundred percent guaranteed. They made their money. They got out. And then everyone was like, this is a crappy product. You should be charging this much. Maybe it sold for like a hundred bucks.
[00:12:32] Anthony: It’s conceptually interesting. Yeah, it was a conceptually interesting product.
Poor execution. Just poor pricing and poor pricing. Yeah. Yeah. This is something gotta be really cash. Alex. Hormo is really big about like pricing yourself. If you can’t be, if you can’t be the cheapest, there’s no, there’s no, um, reward for being second cheapest. Right. So you might as well then go be the most expensive while that works.
If you have quality, if you have quality. Yeah. If you have something worth that, that, that price point mm-hmm [00:13:00] all right. What’s our second number ball. Number two, I’ve been breaking that first one left and right. Just so you know. So put me in handcuff.
[00:13:06] Dan: Are you ripping people off? So in crappy widgets? Yep.
Oh, okay. Mm-hmm um, well, yeah, we’ll circle back. Just widgets left and right. um, number two, the law of compensation, your income is determined by how much by how many people you serve and how well you serve them. So this is kind of tied into the last point, uh, a little bit, but it’s, it’s basically saying that you’re gonna make money, uh, relative to how many people you can.
And how will you help ’em? So, I mean, if you have a little brick and mortar operation in a very small area and you do something really great, but you can only touch like 10 people, like that’s gonna limit your income. Um, and maybe, you know, you could provide some immense value to only one person and you could do quite well.
But typically you’re gonna look at, um, how broad your reach is to, to really figure out [00:14:00] how much money you can make. Cause if you can help a ton of people, just a little bit, that could actually translate into something pretty large.
[00:14:07] Anthony: The thing that stood out to me about this is when I think about. Like one, it’s a really easy framework.
Great way of thinking of like, if you can’t deliver value at scale, it’s really, really hard to build meaningful wealth. Yeah. Um, which is why, w two employees, like, as my mind goes to cuz most people are w two employees, right? Like probably a lot of our listeners are where the, one of the reasons that’s so difficult to make meaningful wealth in that world is because you can’t serve that many people in your W2 really who you’re serving is whoever is your immediate superior and maybe their superior.
So it’s. At most, no matter how great you do your job, you’re only ever able to serve that handful of people. And as a consequence, that company can serve more, but that doesn’t necessarily trickle back to you. Right. It’s almost always like a one to one or one to maybe three ratio. And so your earning potential is always pretty capped because [00:15:00] you can’t go out there and serve the masses.
[00:15:03] Dan: Yeah. I mean, it kind of depends on the industry too. I mean,
[00:15:05] Anthony: uh, if your. I’ll make an exception there. I was
[00:15:08] Dan: gonna say, if you’re, let’s say, um, like a programmer engineer, um, that’s creating a product that’s gonna get out there to the masses, right? Uh, assuming you have some, uh, reasonable comp structure, whether it be bonus or options or something like, um, you know, take a look at, at like Facebook growth.
Like if you were on the development team that helped create that kind of growth, even if you were a w two employee, I bet is you did pretty damn well.
[00:15:34] Anthony: Well they’re they did probably pretty well off the shares of their ownership. Yeah. Right? Like their, their salary was probably pretty good too, but nobody, nobody probably became like a, a hundred millionaire off of their salary.
It was probably off their stock and their options. Yep. And that bonus structure again, like, yeah. But that’s, that’s different than probably what most w two structures are. Where you’re not really tied into like the explosive growth of your, the company. That’s fair. I
[00:15:59] Dan: think it’s, it’s [00:16:00] usually like higher level executive slash tech companies that, that have some of those, like a lot of startups will, um, typically incentivizes really talented people to come on board with that.
But other than that, if you’re going to work at, um, Cargill or target or best buy, and,
[00:16:14] Anthony: and I think about startup people very differently, like, I kind of think of them as like being very entrepreneurial. Like if you’re in the first. hires of like a tech startup. I kind of think of you as a, as a pseudo entrepreneur and that you’re probably gonna be compensated somewhat similarly.
Yeah. Not to the same degree as the founder and like that group, but like yeah. If you help build the thing you
[00:16:34] Dan: should do pretty well. Yeah. Yeah. I agree. Uh, so yeah, lot of compensation. So, um, I don’t know what there is to say about that one. I think it’s pretty self-explanatory. Do you guys feel compensated yet help, immensely or help a ton of.
So law number three is the law of influence. Um, your influence is determined by how abundantly you place other people’s interests first. Uh, and so you need to be according to the author, you need to be [00:17:00] attractive, not sexy. Mm-hmm magnetic. I can’t help it. People need to be drawn to you in order to, in order to have influence and what makes you attractive.
Okay. What.
[00:17:11] Anthony: Uh, glutes skipping glute day, not skipping glute. That’s the opposite. Okay.
[00:17:16] Dan: Only doing glute. No only glute. Uh, what makes you attractive in your is, uh, giving? Oh, so kinda like we talked about number one links back to the title. Oh yeah. I wonder, I wonder if they meant to do that. I bet they did.
It’s a mistake. I bet it’s intentional. so basically if you go around giving and providing value to everybody, people are gonna be drawn to you and that’ll give you.
[00:17:37] Anthony: Yeah, this the, in the timing of this is interesting, cuz I, I haven’t reviewed my notes on this book in a while, but today I posted a video about how to cultivate a magnetic personality because it was something, um, I shared the Kobe Bryant story, right on a previous podcast.
Which one. Okay. So Kobe Bryant, I was listening to this other podcast and these guys went and played basketball with this guy who used [00:18:00] to play basketball or played basketball one time with Kobe. And he was sharing this story, how he played. He met Kobe once they, they were just kind of in passing at this event and they didn’t really sit and talk or anything like that.
Didn’t get to know each other, all that. Well, and then like three weeks later, this guy will call him. Larry just walks into the gym and Kobe’s over there working out and Kobe like across the gym. What’s up Larry what’s up dog. And Larry was like, holy crap. That dude just remembered my name. Like, that’s incredible.
And so then he is like asking me, he’s like Kobe, like, how do you remember my name? Like, what the heck is this? Like, you just have a gift. And Kobe’s like, no, dude, it’s hard. But like most people might only have one interaction with me in their life. And if I remember their name, then it could be like the most meaningful, like interaction that they’ve they’ve ever had with, you know, and that’s gonna be a story that they share.
He’s like, so I treat everybody as like this really important thing. And so I’ve been thinking about that and like how I can incorporate that into my own life of like, how to be magnetic or attractive be influential. And one of the things that I’ve been thinking about is this concept [00:19:00] of giving your attention, giving your full focus to somebody like when you’re in the room with them, be in the room with them, don’t be distracted yeah.
With your phone or anything. And I think that’s what. People really, really sexy honestly, is when they like, are really focused in
[00:19:13] Dan: on you. Yeah. No, I think, well, first off I wanna know how he’s able to do that because I’m horrendous with remembering names and if he can literally remember everybody’s name, he’s gotta have a really good trick for that.
So I don’t know if that’s out there anymore, but someone please tell me, uh, number two. That’s what I’ve heard, said a lot about, uh, bill Clinton. Oh yeah.
[00:19:32] Anthony: I’ve heard that too. Yeah.
[00:19:33] Dan: Like he’s he makes who you are. You’re like person in the world. Yeah. Um, so. I mean , if you could do that great. It’s, it’s gotta be exhausting when you, I don’t have that.
Who’s got people all day long coming up to ’em and you’re able to just zoom in and give that one person everything. It’s it’s a skill.
[00:19:52] Anthony: Yeah. I, I think bill, Clinton’s a great example. I don’t know him, but I’ve heard similar things and it’s a skill I, I want to have, like, I want, I want to be able to [00:20:00] like, have that ability to make somebody feel like seen in the moment.
[00:20:04] Dan: Um, I think it goes hand in hand with politics. Oh, I’m gonna guess a lot of politicians are probably pretty good at that. I
[00:20:10] Anthony: I’m I’m I’m I’m sure there’s a nature nurture component here. I’m sure. Bill Clinton was like coming out of the womb, shaking the, the doctor’s hands and being like, thank you. How are you?
Thank you, Rick. I really appreciate you. The work that you did here was real fine today. Now, if you don’t mind, I’m gonna go, go poop. Wipe me on a little poopy. Yeah. anyways, big tangent, weird image. But I do think this one’s a really important one. Yeah. That, um, If you can, if you can figure out how to like, turn it into a game or a skill that you’re like actively developing mm-hmm I think it would pay big dividends.
[00:20:43] Dan: Yeah. I mean, I don’t know if, uh, I mean, it takes a lot to get to Kobe level or, or bill Clinton level, but you know, if you put other people’s fir interest first and, and, you know, follow the philosophies of this book, theoretically, that should, uh, get you there, get, get you at least
[00:20:57] Anthony: part of the way. Yeah, maybe, maybe just one, one starting [00:21:00] point is like when you’re sitting.
lunch, coffee meeting, like networking event, whatever it is. Stop looking at your damn phone. Try be try. Yeah. Try your damnedest when you’re with somebody to be like, okay, you’re the only person in this room. Yeah. I’m only gonna focus on you and not like creepily. , don’t be creepy about it. People you’re not even doing, but like, try to try to give them the sense that they’re like the center of the universe.
[00:21:20] Dan: Well, I honestly, that was kind of a joke I said before about the phone, but I have heard from, uh, at least a handful of people over the years. That, uh, they have a lot of respect for when they go out to whether it be coffee or dinner or whatever, with me, like my phone’s never on the table, it’s in my pocket.
Mm-hmm like, and I just always do that just because I think it’s polite, but there’s a number of people who have picked up on it because I think so few people do it. Yeah. And it’s just constantly, like, even if you just glance at it, like people see that break of concentration.
[00:21:51] Anthony: And here’s an interesting thing.
I don’t know who I heard this. Where, but they, they suggested they do this. Um, I, I, I don’t do this, but, um, when he would [00:22:00] go out to dinner or go into a meeting or something, he would make a show of like pulling out his phone and say, Hey, just one second. I wanna turn off my phone so we don’t get interrupted.
And like, he’d like make a, like a todo of it and then put it away and be like, okay, I’m here. So like making it very clear to the other person, like, Hey, I’ve shut out the other, the rest of the world. Like you got me. Hmm. Which is, that’s another way to do it. It’s interesting. I’ve never done. Maybe I, if that’s my style, maybe give it a shot out there.
People like report back how it went.
[00:22:25] Dan: yeah. Um, so law number four, if you’re ready. I’m I’m braced coming at you. I’m braced. Are you ready for this? Yeah. Look at me. Law I’m of authenticity. Okay. Yeah. Good. What’s this about no fake BS. Um, I mean, there’s a line from the book that says the most valuable gift that you have, uh, to offer is yourself.
Um, but it’s basically just about being, you know, true to yourself. And I think. Was especially, um, uh, important or not was, is especially important these days with so many people that go out and project the image that they think, [00:23:00] uh, They should be. Um, there’s so much crap on social media with people acting like they are something other than they are, whether it be, um, hanging out in front of a Ferrari, they rented or pretending like they’re flying on private jets or posting BS, net worth numbers.
Um, like there’s so many people out there that just try to put out this image and I think they might rationalize it by. Saying, it’s like, oh, you just fake it till you make it. But it is, people can see that people can tell when you’re being genuine and people can tell when you’re yessing.
[00:23:29] Anthony: So I, I just, I just recently this week have been re-listening to Neal’s podcast on how to get rich, that it is like a three hour podcast.
It’s so good. Um, I, I, listen, I’ve listened to it, like probably like two dozen times at this point, but I hadn’t listened to it in a while. And the part that stood out to me most recently, he was talking about how. In, in, in a competitive environment, a lot of times people are trying to compete by imitation.
And his takeaway is you escape [00:24:00] competition through auth authenticity, because nobody can compete with you as if you are. You you’re a unique snowflake. Exactly. Nobody can replace Dan if like Dan leaves my life, there is no other Dan there’s people maybe have some qualities of Dan, but he is, you. Um, he’s one of one.
And when you’re building businesses or a product, or like trying to bring value to the world, like recognize that, um, if you’re trying to imitate, then you’re in competition with thousands, if not millions of other people. But if you focus on authenticity, nobody can compete with you. Cuz you’re one of one.
And I thought, I thought that was like, for whatever reason, just hit me this time differently. Mm-hmm um, and that’s why I go back and listen to these things is like you read books or you listen to great content. It, it pulls something new out each time. Mm-hmm .
[00:24:45] Dan: Yeah. And I, I can agree with mark. I, I can understand why people are insecure about this.
Um, I think everyone’s not everyone. Most people have probably felt insecure when they first start to have to start putting themselves out there. Uh, especially from like a business branding marketing [00:25:00] perspective. Like you might feel like I don’t wanna really share myself, but, um, There’s some really weird, awkward people who’ve done quite well, just being themselves.
Mm-hmm so if you’re really weird and awkward, don’t worry about it. Uh, look at Zuckerberg I was just gonna say Zuckerberg. Yeah. I mean, he’s doing okay. Just being himself,
[00:25:16] Anthony: even if he’s a robot, his, his episode of Joe Rogan. I heard that was good. Really good. He’s really,
[00:25:21] Dan: uh, improved his, um, Interpersonal being
[00:25:24] Anthony: a human.
Yeah. Yeah. Well, on that, he’s getting better on, on that note of authentic. Well, here, I got two things. Actually. One is on Zuckerberg. It’s really funny cuz people like to criticize him and judge him as being like awkward and weird. And it’s like, well, yeah, he’s awkward. He’s an awkward and weird dude. Like, but you’re bullying him for being awkward and weird.
Like he was. like, like he’s a nerd and so effectively you’re just bullying him for being like the quintessential nerd. I think Joe Rogan like
[00:25:49] Dan: made him take a sip of water. So to see if it was like a normal person on the vodka,
[00:25:53] Anthony: did he drink? Yeah. Yeah. I think he did it normally, but to, to the point of authenticity, one thing I do, I, I think I’ve been thinking about [00:26:00] recently is that when we’re young in and we’re in school, the system is designed to get us to conform, but then later on in life, In a very real way.
The goal is to become an individual and to stand out and become like those things that make you unique are then what you’re you’re compensated for. So it’s like this weird switch where you spend so much of your life thinking conform is the right way. And then you get to adulthood and you realize like all the things.
That you were taught in school to conform are actually the wrong things. Yeah. That they’re not gonna help you get ahead.
[00:26:34] Dan: I feel like her Mo was saying something kinda like that recently and something I saw, I forgot what he was talking about, but he was talking about how, um, uh, a lot of parents like condition their kids incorrectly, like not intentionally, but, um, I don’t want get into it cause I can’t remember the exact one he was making, but it sounds pretty, yeah.
Pretty close to that. Um, but yeah, be yourself. So law number five. the law [00:27:00] of receptivity.
[00:27:03] Anthony: Oh, this one. Yeah, this one’s interesting. I think this one’s maybe the weirdest, one of all. What do you
[00:27:11] Dan: think? I mean, I kind of got it. Um, I think that, uh, a lot of people, I wanna say like newer business owners, entrepreneurs, uh, we’ve talked about it with respect to artists, uh, when we’re doing show your work.
Mm-hmm I think a lot of people find. Have a feeling of guilt surrounded by, uh, taking things. I know I do. If someone tries to compliment me. Yeah. Uh, I’ve. I’ve, I’ve gotten better at it, but for a long time, I was just get like super awkward and uncomfortable cuz I would hate to get compliments. Um, and I think there’s people like that with money.
I think there’s people like that with compliments. Um, But you, you, you can’t, you can’t be turned off by getting compensated in some way for things, if you’re truly providing value. And you know, that’s what I think a lot of people want is they wanna get wealthy. They wanna get better. They wanna do [00:28:00] whatever.
Like you’re gonna have to be open to those things actually coming your way. Mm-hmm . Cause if you get weird about it, or if you feel guilty about it, then it’s all for, not that
[00:28:07] Anthony: won’t come your way. The, so to break this one down for the listeners, the law of receptivity at its core is to the effect. You the greatest gift you can give somebody else is allowing them to give you a gift or to give you some value.
And at, at phase value, that seems really strange. Like a really like, wait, the greatest gift I can give is to allow somebody else to give me a gift. But if you think about it from the framework of, uh, it’s better to give than to receive. Right. If we take that as a truism and take that as fact, then somebody giving somebody else something like that’s the better gift.
Not, not receiving it. It’s the giving. It makes you feel good. It makes you feel altruistic or whatever. So being on the receiving end of that and allowing somebody to give you something is the greatest gift. Now it’s interesting. It’s weird. , but I do think that’s truth. Like when you talk about [00:29:00] like compensation or compliments, I think those are really obvious ones.
Um, but just even allowing somebody to deliver value mm-hmm , it seems really weird, but I’ve seen it in my own personal life where people like light up mm-hmm when, when you’re open to that. Yeah. And I don’t know how to explain it. It’s just so weird to me. Like my mind doesn’t want to. acknowledge this one, but I think there’s actually like some deep psychology behind it.
[00:29:31] Dan: Yeah, there is, I think a really good example, uh, that most everybody could relate to is, um, let’s say you’re out to lunch with a friend and they mean a lot to you and you wanna pay, you wanna pick up the bill and they don’t let you it, how, how annoying is that? Like you wanna pick up the tab or somebody they’re like, no, no, I got it.
And they aggressively put the card down and they kind of pull that Dick move where they don’t let you pick up the tab. I’ve done it. Trying to be. Again, overly nice and whatever, but in retrospect, like you, you look like a [00:30:00] jerk, the other person’s frustrated cause they wanna try to do something nice and you don’t let ’em do it.
So I think the picking up the tab thing, we’ve all had that experience. Just let someone pay. I have, um, it’s, you know, I have
[00:30:13] Anthony: this, I don’t know whose story this is, this, this lady, it might come to me as I’m telling her story. She, she shared, uh, this exact thing. It was, it. The, it was really interesting. So she grew up in a very, very poor family and like scraping and skimping and her dad worked his butt off.
And, um, whenever, whenever he could, he would like slide her 20 bucks. Like she was going to school and like, she he’d he’d come and visit her. And he’d like slide her 20 bucks. And, and that was. This big deal, like early on when she was poor, obvious 20 bucks is a lot. And then as she started moving further and further through life and doing better and better, the $20 became trivial.
And it became to a point where it was just insignificant really in the grand scheme, cuz she ended up becoming, doing very, [00:31:00] very well. And she, she hurt him one day. Very, very badly. Not realizing that she was doing this because sh he did what he always did. He tried to give her 20 bucks and she’s. She looked at him and she was like, I don’t, I don’t need this dad.
I, I made a million dollars last year. I don’t need your money. Right. And it hurt him very, very deeply because for him, it was a way of like showing his love and his care. And she like denied it and it created a little bit of a rift in their relationship and they eventually mend it cuz it took her a while to like unpack what she had done.
But it’s, it’s this law in like a very real visceral way.
[00:31:37] Dan: Yeah. Yeah. I think an easy way to kind of try to implement this kind of thing in your life is. Um, I always try to perceive the other side’s perspective, right? If someone’s trying to pay you for a thing, if they’re trying to do something nice for you or, or give value to you, put yourself in their shoes and, you know, get denied that like, you know, if you’re in their shoes, would you still make that decision?
Um, [00:32:00] you know, if I can turn the table myself in all those situations where. um, someone’s trying to buy me lunch or pay me a compliment. Like it’s just really frustrating on the other end, even if you’re not hurt emotionally, like this mm-hmm father was because you felt like he was doing the dad thing and providing, um, nine times outta 10, the other person’s just gonna be irritated or frustrated by not being able to get their fix cuz they get, uh, they’ve they’ve obviously got a, um, a selfish motive as well.
It makes them feel good to do that. Mm-hmm they wanna feel that. And if you take that away then. No BU know, no, but I know no. BU know. So are those, all our laws? That’s all. I think we took long to explain ’em than it would take to read the book, but you have it too late. You already
[00:32:41] Anthony: listened to us. Can’t go back.
You
[00:32:42] Dan: got a visual of bill Clinton being born and shaking the hand of a doctor. That’s not in the book.
[00:32:47] Anthony: That’s not in the book. That’s a, that’s a, that’s a, multi-family investing made simple, original, sorry. Um, side, side note. Tangent. Yeah. You only, you only get that here,
[00:32:58] Dan: folks. yeah. [00:33:00] So anything else, should we wrap it up?
I think so. Should we
[00:33:03] Anthony: so Gallop off into
[00:33:04] Dan: the, the sunset? Yeah, I was gonna saunter person. I don’t gonna Gallop.
[00:33:09] Anthony: Well, here’s the thing I wanna, I wanna put that, that, that, that law of receptivity into effect right now. So listeners, I want to make myself open to receiving the gift of review reviews. It’s one of the, it’s one of the ways it’s one of my love language.
Reviews reviews. yeah, so I missed that chapter. Uh, I was in the locker room the other day at Jisu and somebody goes, love languages are stupid, everybody. All it is is like, what was the one? What was the form of love that your dad didn’t give you when you were a kid? Oh, you didn’t, you love like you receive hugs.
Oh, your dad didn’t hug you. And like words of affirmation. Oh, your dad never affirmed you. So my dad never gave me reviews is all I’m saying, dad, if you’re listening to. You haven’t left a review and I know it cause I look every single day and I’m just, I’m waiting. So everybody else you can tune out, but dad, if you’re there [00:34:00] you go over to iTunes right now and leave a review.
I understand that it’s very complicated and scary technology is overwhelming, but you can do this. You’re grown, man. You owe me, I’m doing this for you. You’re welcome. And end scene. . Anybody still there. That’s it all. Let’s all got guys. If you guys have got any value this, we do appreciate you. Um, go share this with somebody that you think is not giving enough and tell that to their face and, uh, go download the notes.
Invictus multifamily.com/notes. And we’ll, we’ll see you in the next episode.
[00:34:34] Dan: Bye bye yours.
